When the Monsters rear the heads and cast their shadows

We all have them, the demons and ghosts in the closet. Sometimes they call to you in the night and tear at your dreams and your hopes. Sometimes they sneak in, in ways you never knew they could. Those dangerous creatures can cause you to outcry in pain, or to retreat in terror. They can cause you to make bad decisions or they can teach you a valuable lesson. 

Have you ever stopped and just walked up to your monsters and asked them "WHY? Why do you torture me, how do I get you to work on my behalf and make me better, instead of causing me to break myself down?"

I can honestly tell you, my demons are vast. They can stretch to my toddler years if I were to allow them to. Here's the thing...I have had long discussions with my dark souls, they have given me many sleepless nights, but many of them have given me the answers I longed for, when asked, they whisper from their darkness, "Girl, we know your secrets, your torments, you will not win all the things you wish for, but because you have asked these questions of us, we will give you the chance to be free of the pain we have caused you in the past...but you must know, we are always hiding behind you, and sometimes we will make you feel unsure, scared, or cause to question yourself... but you are free to let us go, since you have confronted us." 

The problem is, sometimes you become so used to those monsters that you almost miss them when they have left you. No matter how hard one may try to dissolve their past in lye , not all demons die, they just go hide somewhere else. 

So then one must ask, "How do I trust again? How do I stay silent when I wish to be loud? How do I make it right, when so much water has passed through the destruction that once was my bridge to the stars? How do I make the changes needed in order to gain that which I see as perfect? 

Do you know what? My ghosts tell me again, "because we are never gone, just inactive, we have given you all you will ever need to make the right choices, you just need the eyes to see which path to follow. For all the bad we have placed in your soul, we have placed just as much light. You just need to feel around until you find the light switch and when you find that switch, your eyes will be blinded by all that you hope for. 

We will give you all the tools you need to rebuild...just keep following your hands along the walls in your dark rooms, and when you find the switch, flip it on, and the world will be yours again. For ghosts cant be seen in the light, demons can't live there either, and everyone knows monsters hate the daylight. Stay strong, stay vigilant, and listen to your ghosts, because sometimes they will help you. Have faith in you."